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The Challenges Facing The African Christian Family (2)

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A LECTURE by Fr Dr. Dr. Anthony E ONYEOCHA

Rev. Fr. Dr. Anthony E ONYEOCHA

Rev. Fr. Dr. Anthony E ONYEOCHA

The fear of a family curse that may hinder progress in business.

–  the fear of sudden deaths, of spiritual attacks, of strange visits by the ghosts.

06. A belief that sickness and illness can be sent from a distance by an unknown enemy – such sicknesses like stroke, heart attack, fatal accidents or witchcraft, high BP, achere, road accidents. A belief that my married daughter’s womb has been locked up by an enemy to prevent pregnancy or that some powerful enemy is withholding my pretty daughter from getting a husband.

07. The African seems to live in perpetual fear, fear of imaginary evil spirits and ghosts, fear of an imaginary devil and witchcraft, fear of life and fear of death. For him every misfortune is caused by one juju or one unknown enemy. If a successful young man dies, someone who was jealous of his progress must have poisoned him. If the rain is falling, a rain maker is behind it and if the rain refuses to fall, a rain controller is behind it.

08. Too often the people think that religion and even Christianity itself is only for the exterior practice. Experience shows that even the best practising Catholics, Knights of the Catholic Church inclusive, again and again reason and act in a way true to the pagan way of life instead of thinking and behaving as convinced Catholics. The “old” man continues to dominate. This is how the mind of the African Christian works. His mentality is still unchristian.

09. To Christianise the African family group or better still to transform the milieu,  the Church must start by debunking these family superstitions and the Old home truths, especially among the rural populations and among the uneducated where mass conversions leave quite intact a very unchristian mentality, which to all intents and purposes gets the better of the baptised Christian and in cases of conflict, wins the day against whatever religious allegiance he vowed on the day of baptism. The Church has the duty to Christianise the pagan/native environment.

2.  THE CHURCH AND IRREGULAR MARRIAGES

Let us start with one case history

01. Not long ago, the Chairman of the Finance Council of my parish made this public announcement at the end of the Sunday Mass: I beg those who are collecting the harvest levy not to collect from only the wedded families. They should equally go to the unwedded ones because the unwedded families far outnumber the weeded ones.

02. Matrimonial irregularity is probably one of the most serious problems that our local Church has to face from within. Sociological studies show that many Catholics in various parts of Nigeria, for example, cannot receive Holy Communion because they are living in irregular marriages. Obviously they suffer from being cut off from the sacraments, which are the main source of Christian life and the main source of grace established by Our Lord, Jesus himself.

04. But they are also a scandal and a stumbling block, not only to those within the Christian communities, but also to those outside, since they dishonour the Christian name and give the wrong impression of the Christian way of life, thus impeding the spread of the Church.

05. This takes on different forms – some examples are:

5.1) Married but not yet wedded – experience shows that there are many couples in our Churches who after the traditional marriage start living together and making babies. Some do not think of wedding at all and some others will wait until they have enough money for the feasting. But there are couples who will wait until after the four or five child. Some even reach old age before they can think of wedding. How many young people prefer traditional marriages to the sacramental bond?

5.2) Divorced and remarried: How many men break off their sacramental marriages after a few years and take advantage of the customary law to contract a fresh union? It would be nice to find out in your individual homes and parishes, how frequently this occurs.

5.3) How many men, these days die in irregular unions but shortly after their burials, their widowed wives come in their mourning dresses to the parish office asking to be received back to the sacraments?

5.4) Fruit of the womb: How many men abandon their wedded wives, or simply pick up a second wife because they have not been fruitful? For the African, the womb is a plant and must bear fruits. If any woman’s womb fails in this regard, her husband will be advised to take a “new wife” and abandon the barren pawpaw plant. Nobody bothers to find out if the man has a low sperm count or any other medical condition. The wife is always judged guilty.

5.5) A woman has no religion until she gets married – this false axiom has misled many Catholic girls. There are many married women who until today lament that they cannot go to sacraments because they married a non Catholic and had to follow him to his own protestant Church.

5.6) Experience shows that among the Catholic youth, especially those in the tertiary institutions, a good number does not go to sacraments because these students were not able as children to do their First Holy Communion lessons. A special arrangement could be made for them.

5.7) Pregnant Brides – Observations show that these days there are many pregnant brides on our altars. Should we not frown at such a practice? Do we still preach and encourage chaste wedlock? The church condemns pre-marital sex relations as mortal sinful. The Mary League Girls Association is always very proud when its members wed chaste.

An author criticises what she once witnessed:”Look at the array of pregnant brides all in whites with veils, gloves and socks. See how tired and unchaste they look. Where is that innocence and purity of virtues symbolised by their white garments? They do not seem to understand. Why must these young women fall so easily to temptations? And have fallen, why must they parade their vices as if they were virtues to be copied? Pregnant brides put the cart before the horse. They live marriage before they marry……..

The white dress and the veil of the bride are a sign of chastity. They signify a virgin womb. They stand for innocence. The church expects her sons and daughters to wed chaste. This is exactly what Tobias of old and his wife Sarah did. In his prayer Tobit said: ”Now Lord, you know that I take this wife of mine not because of lust, but for a noble purpose. Before we sleep together, call down your mercy on me and her and allow us to live together to a happy old age” (tobit 8,6-7).

5.8) Masked Polygamy: How many of the elite practise masked polygamy, the custom of taking a second, third or fourth mistress, all scattered throughout the city?

5.9) How many of the “been-tos” leave behind their American or European court-wedded wives and children overseas and come back home to Africa to pick up an African wife? There are also cases of men who came back alone from the USA/UK to live in Nigeria but their sons and daughters and even Igbo wife refused to come back with them. Some of these men are with a great difficulty living as married singles, while some others have picked up a second wife.

 

To be contd.

 


 

Fr Dr. Dr. Anthony Ekendu Onyeocha
(0803-560-3859)

 

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The Data of Forgiveness

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The Universal Character of Salvation

The most important ingredient in today’s media economy is data. The amount of data available determines how much and how long we can work or play on the internet. Currently, many of the service providers offer unlimited data plans but we know that those “unlimited” plans are not always unlimited. Sometimes, your download speed can get slowed down when you cross a certain point. Today, however, Jesus gives us the divine model of an unlimited plan. It is the unlimited bundle of compassion and forgiveness which never gets slowed downed shut down for maintenance. The theme for this week is that we must learn to forgive without limits no matter the injury committed against us.

In Matthew’s Gospel, today’s teaching on unlimited forgiveness comes after Jesus had told his disciples the parable of the wandering sheep, so it is plausible that some would have wondered among themselves how many times a good shepherd should go after the same sheep if it keeps wandering away. In those days, people believed that forgiveness was limited to three times only – a fourth transgression was not to be forgiven. So, by asking Jesus how many times he should forgive his brother, Peter was probably aiming to increase the limit to seven times. And Jesus makes it clear that we are to forgive others, “not seven times but seventy-seven times” (Matt. 18:22).That means we must dispense an unlimited data bundle of mercy.

In Jesus Christ, we have the forgiveness of a debt we could never pay. Sin is an offence against God and a direct rebellion against his authority and creation. The debt of 10,000 talents mentioned in today’s parable symbolizes the magnitude of the offence that sin causes in God’s eyes, but he is always willing to forgive without limits. However, we can easily cut ourselves off from God’s river of mercy when we refuse to forgive others. We end up restraining God’s mercy and putting ourselves under strict justice. To unfold his mercy without compromising his justice, God leaves each person free to choose between the two. If we insist on strict justice when we are offended, we bring God’s strict justice upon ourselves. But if we offer an unlimited bundle of mercy to others, we draw God’s unlimited data of forgiveness upon ourselves.

The secret to forming a forgiving heart lies in recognizing the evil of our sin and the immensity of God’s goodness in forgiving us. Until we see the ugliness of our ingratitude and selfishness, we will never appreciate the generosity of God’s forgiveness. Let us examine ourselves now to see how much forgiveness we are giving. Is there someone we still cannot forgive even after they have expressed sorrow for their actions? Have we judged someone too harshly because of something they said or did that we did not particularly like? How many times have we failed to help somebody because we are still dwelling on an injury that we suffered many years ago? How many times have we treated someone differently based on preconceived notions or stereotypes? These are some of the factors that shackle us like chains and that disrupt the unlimited data of divine grace in our lives. When we close ourselves off to people or dismiss them based on our preconceptions, mistaken judgments, and prejudices, not only do we make them suffer, we suffer as well.

But it does not have to be that way. Jesus came to free us from and the burden of sin and unhappiness. Forgiveness is like mercury, which runs away when it is held tightly in the hand but is preserved by keeping the palm open. When we lose forgiveness, we lose the ability to give and to receive love because love is the foundation of forgiveness. And since God is the foundation of love, whoever refuses to forgive automatically rejects the love of God. This is the essence of today’s parable and it is highlighted by the contrast between what was owed by each man. The wicked slave owed his master some 10000 talents. In gold terms, that is 350 tons and at today’s price, he owed his master USD21.8 billion. This was way more than King Solomon made in a year which was 666 talents of gold or USD1.45 billion in today’s value (cf. I Kings 10:14). So, this unforgiving servant owed his master what no individual could never payback. In contrast, his fellow servant owed him the equivalent of one talent of gold or USD2.1 million; so a man who was forgiven $21.8b could not let go of $2.1m, and his wickedness landed him in the hands of torturers.

Dear friends, forgiveness is an act of compassion which is expressed in the free choice to pardon one another’s shortcomings every day, and to also pardon ourselves for own mistakes Forgiveness transcends the fear of being wounded again; it is a deliberate act in imitation of the redemptive work of Jesus, the advocacy of the Holy Spirit, and the loving kindness of the Father. The whole point of today’s parable is that our Father in heaven will do the same to anyone who refuses to forgive others. Whoever refuses to forgive is doomed to a life of bitterness, and as the ugly trend continues, the person ends up building invisible walls of resentment around themselves, thereby blocking off not just one’s relationships with other people but with God as well. Forgiveness is not just an emotional expression or a sense of righteousness; it means being merciful not only when there is an explanation or apology, or a promise of amendment from the offender, but even when the offence is deliberate, and the offender is adamant. Forgiveness is a precious gift of grace, which does not depend on the worthiness of the receiver. Forgiveness is what we called to do, and the Lord’s grace is sufficient for us in that regard. Amen.

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Imo Deputy Governor’s giant strides towards revitalizing agriculture

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Imo Deputy Governor's giant strides towards revitalizing agriculture
By Joy Opara

The increasing cost of Agricultural products in Imo State in recent times has continued to be a major source of concern to the citizens of the state.

A critical appraisal of the development of Agriculture in this state reveals that successive governments had neglected this major sector of the economy, over three decades now, and this has adversely affected the revenue of government.

In line with the vision of the “shared prosperity” government of the Hope Uzodinma administration, the revolution of agriculture is among its cardinal programmes for which a high powered committee (on agricultural master plan for Imo State) has been set up.
For the purpose of resuscitating all moribund agricultural industries and facilities in the state, it is not surprising that this committee is headed by a world class Professor of Agriculture and Deputy Governor of Imo State, Prof. Placid Njoku.

The need to diversify the economy cannot be over-emphasized. It is a well known fact that there is no better and more sustainable means of diversifying the economy than through agriculture. It would be recalled that after the inauguration of his committee, the deputy governor went into action, first by visiting all moribund agricultural facilities in the state, which included Adapalm in Ohaji/ Egbema LGA, Avutu Poultry farm in Avutu, Obowo LGA, Songhai farms, Okigwe road, Owerri, ADP farms in Nekede, Owerri West. Others are Acharaubo farms in Emekuku, Owerri North, Imo Rubber Plantation in Obiti, Ohaji/ Egbema, amongst others.
Prof. Njoku in one of his speeches during the tour described agriculture as the economic base of most countries of the world. Considering the dwindling oil revenue, he said it should be a source of worry to people of good conscience that the vision of our founding fathers to generate revenue, food security, economic advancement, industrialization, employment and eradication of poverty was destroyed by successive governments.
The Deputy Governor, who not only is acknowledged as one of the greatest professors of Animal Science, a renowned Agriculturist and former Vice Chancellor of a leading University of Agriculture, the Federal University of Agriculture, Umudike, made it clear that the present government led by Governor Hope Uzodinma is desirous to return agriculture to its former glory.

The Ikeduru-born technocrat and farmer per-excellence said that the 3R Mantra of this administration namely: Reconstruction, Rehabilitation and Recovery is a base for making the dream of Imo State as the food basket of the nation come true.

Noting that government is a continuum, the deputy governor promised that his committee will build upon what is already on ground by rehabilitating the ones that could be rehabilitated and bringing in new facilities where necessary to ensure that the passion of the governor towards agricultural revival is achieved.

Meanwhile, in most of the establishments visited by the committee, it was discovered that indigenes of the communities had badly encroached into the lands and converted them to personal use. Investigations by the committee revealed that agents of some past governments in the state connived with the communities to make it possible, for their personal aggrandizement.

The deputy governor, whose humility has become legendary pledged his total support to the Governor, Senator Hope Uzodinma whom he described as God sent to right all that were done wrong by the previous administrations in the state. He called on all to give this administration the needed support to rewrite the history of Imo State in gold, especially the agricultural sector.

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Child Abuse: A case of betrayal of reciprocal trust

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Child Abuse: A case of betrayal of reciprocal trust
By Christian Uzoukwu

Some years ago, while as a kid, I fell out with my father due to an occasion of sheer disobedience and on that very day, I was given no food and was ultimately battered by hunger. Child abuse includes both acts of commission and omission on the part of parents, guardians as well as care-givers.

These acts have led to a lot of actual and threatened harm meted out on countless number of children. In 2014, the WHO made an estimate of 41,000 children (under the age of 15) that are victims of homicide and other related offences. This estimate, as expounded by this world body is grossly below the real figures due to the views of the society in relation to corporal punishment experienced by children. Girls are always most vulnerable to different forms of child abuse during unrests and in war-thorn territories.

Cases of child abuse can be established in some deadly human vices such as child trafficking, child labour, forced adoption as seen in the one-child policy prevalent in China. In the Asian country, women, by law are only allowed to have one child. Local governments would sometimes allow the woman to give birth and then they would take the baby away stating the mother violated the one child policy. Child traffickers, often paid by the government, would sell the children to orphanages that would arrange international adoptions worth tens of thousands of dollars, turning a profit for the government.

Other striking examples of child abuse are the various forms of violence against the girl-child which involves infanticide, sex-selective abortions, female genital mutilations (FGM), sexual initiation of virgins in some African cultures, breast ironing in some parts of Cameroon – involving the vicious use of hot stones and other tools to flatten the breast tissue of girls who have attained the age of puberty. As if those were not enough, female students are also subject to maltreatments in countries like Afghanistan and Pakistan. This is not to talk of recurring kidnapp of female students in some parts of Nigeria, as we saw in the case of Dapchi and Chibok schoolgirls.

Based on simple analysis, child abuse can be defined as “all forms of physical and/or emotional ill-treatment, sexual abuse, neglect or negligent treatment or commercial or other exploitation, resulting in actual or potential harm to the child’s health, survival, development or dignity in the context of a relationship of responsibility, trust or power”.

This definition by WHO also falls in line with the definition propounded by the United States Centres for Disease Control and Prevention, which says that child abuse are acts of commission. This commission includes “words or overt actions that cause harm, potential harm, or threat of harm to a child”, and acts of omission (neglect), meaning “the failure to provide for a child’s basic physical, emotional, or educational needs or to protect a child from harm or potential harm.

In Nigeria, most cases of child abuse have become cumbersome due to the fact that these acts of abuses are regarded as mere punishments to unruly young ones and by so doing, should be justified and doesn’t call for any further discussion and/or scrutiny. According to various statistical studies and researches, child abuse is a vast societal cankerworm and has four profound tentacles viz:

Physical Abuse: this involves undue hitting, beating, kicking, shaking, biting, burning, strangling, insertion of pepper into the eyes and pubic regions of children, maltreatments from house-help(s) and seniors at boarding/day schools, suffocating and forcing children to live in unwholesome conditions.

Sexual Abuse also includes persuading a minor into acts of sexual intercourse, exposure of the child’s private parts, production of child-related pornographic contents and actual sexual contacts with children.

Psychological Abuse of children can be seen in cases of excessive scolding, lack of proper attention that children should be receiving from their parents and guardians, destructive criticisms and destruction of a child’s personality.

Neglect of children can also lead to children dropping out of schools, begging/stealing for food and money, lack of proper medical care for minors and realities of children looking like ragamuffins.

Consequently, the causes of child abuse can be judiciously related to sex, age, personal history, societal norms, economic challenges, lack of Rights’ Protection Agencies, parents battling with traits of alcoholism and family size. These causative agents of child abuse can bring untold effects upon the society at large and these effects can be emotional, physical and psychological as the case may be, giving rise to individuals with dissociative lifestyles.

Furthermore, the treatment of individuals who have been malformed with respect to the abuses they experienced abinitio, can be a long process because it involves behavioral therapy and other forms of neoteric therapies. Treatments of psyche-related problems are not just a one-day process due to the long-lasting effects of abuses on various conscious mental activities. It is also noteworthy to point out that, prevention is always better than cure and holding fast to this true reality, entails that agencies who have the responsibility of protecting the rights of children must continue to do the needful which requires proper oversights of parent-child relationships.

To conclude this piece therefore, we must agree that untold hardships have been a great challenge for children especially in Africa and some parts of Asia. Children with long histories of abuses turn out to become societal misfits. To this end we encourage that: Children should be given a free platform to express themselves on many topical issues and issues relating to their existence.

Children should also be allowed to freely ask questions on any issue, no matter, how weird it seems to be.

Governments should make regulations outlawing societal norms and values that might amount to child abuses.

Corporal punishments by parents, guardians and care-givers should be discouraged at all levels, thereby making parents/guardians/care-givers who seem to be incorrigible, to face the full weight of justice enshrined in the law of the land.

Education system (both conventional and unconventional) in Nigeria should be able to train up young ones into becoming critical, analytical and evaluative individuals with a view of defending the vulnerable.

And again, since children are said to be leaders of tomorrow, it is pertinent to note that to secure their future, their present existence must be cherished and protected.

Christian Chimemerem Uzoukwu
08100029867 / 09025760804
Admin Critical Thinkers’ Forum.

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